My Trip to the USA

So to continue where I left of. It was really nice having someone there for me after my other friend abandoned me. Okay, I do get it. I was clinging to her and wasn't really at my best at all... So I do understand that she had enough of me. I'm just really grateful that I had another friend there to support me at the time.

Things were going really well between my new friend and I. We talked a lot every day and had lots of fun. The thing was though, that if not for her, I'd likely just lay in bed all day and pretty much not do anything at all. I'd probably not even eat or function properly. I didn't really talk to anyone, after all.

I learned that she had her birthday in March and we talked about the possibility that I come visit. At first it was like talking about a fantasy, but then in March I actually did travel all the way from Norway to the USA.

17 and half hours later and kinda of stressed, I arrived and met my friend that I'd only been talking to for about 4 and a bit months. Things were good to begin with but I started having problems and depression kind of set in for me pretty quickly. I loved being with this new friend of mine but she had school and work and so did her boyfriend. So I was stuck at home for most of the time. Being so close to someone that was there for me and made me happy was hard.

The other thing that was hard for me was watching her and her boyfriend being close. I've been feeling alone for too long and was really wanting attention. So I ended up with taking walks very often. Walks in the middle of the night. It was really stupid of me to do that because you do sometimes hear gunshots around the area. And a week after I'd started going on these midnight walks, to try relieve my depression, we heard that 3 people had been shot in the area. And was told to stop, and not do that again. I promised that I would stop going on these walks. But instead I ended up smoking a lot and standing in their driveway.

We celebrated her birthday the first weekend I was here and that went really well. We had a great time and the cake was great, though a little too much to finish. And she got some nice gifts.

After this, things were really going up and down for me. I was depressed but we talked and things were okay in a sense. But then COVID-19 happened and my flight was cancelled. I was supposed to take the flight home 17th March but my next flight was 12th April. So I had to stay for like a whole month more.

Things started to take a turn for the worse for me, I was getting really depressed. So for the time being I'm stuck here and things haven't been looking to great for me. Then a couple days ago I learned that the 12th April flight was cancelled as well. And that my new flight is the 3rd of May. That would mean I'd have to be here for 2 months. And so far I can't go out, I don't have a drivers licence or a car and can't even get a job here. So, socially I'm pretty isolated at times. I can't go see anything at all.

So I'll leave it at that for today. I just needed to write and get things out. Because I really want to get home. And I've likely not formulated much very correctly. I'm not the best writer, but I try to get what's on my mind and what's been happening out.

Thanks for reading. And there is a positive post coming tomorrow.

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